The Tri-Rant line

1st Rant-
I HATE getting my schedule done. It's such an angst-ridden time for me. I'm so paranoid that I'll screw it up somehow (I know, illogical; believe me, that doesn't stop me). So, to alleviate the angst, I went to my counselor, whose job it is, lets see...to counsel. I had a whole list of questions etc etc. and expected her to be helpful and eager.
No. No, she was bored, detached, and generally uninterested. She made me feel like I was incompetent because I didn't thoroughly know the stupid complicated j-school class system. (That's HER job, not mine).
Even so, I left with a good idea of what classes I'll be taking, no thanks to her. I only came out successfully because I wrote all those questions ahead of time. If I hadn't, we'd have just stared at each other. Blah!

2nd Rant-
Why is it so danged cold in the mornings but not in the afternoons? Now I'll have to take out my winter clothes and smell like dust for a week or two until they all get washed. Arg! Just be consistent, weather!

3rd Rant-
Now I have a Second bout of "Meg is a lesbian" rumors going about. That's just what I need. Just because I went to a play about gay couples with AIDS and got some Roommate Bondage and then shared ice cream and was driven home by another dear lady does NOT mean I'm gay. I very much enjoy my Adam.

Uh, thanks, I think

My grandparents send me the weirdest gifts...this one is pretty high up there on the wall of weird.

My "Halloween Present":
a plus-size bag of Tootsie Rolle Midgees
a bag of salted peanuts, still in the shells
one pair green gloves
one box birthday cards, four varieties, 16 cards total
a cosmetic box containing a built-in mirror, curling & lengthening mascara, 'wet look' lipgloss, 2 bottles nailpolish, in "Black Stain" and "Fuchsia Flash"
one bottle White-Out, "with foam brush"


Weird...I know. Gotta love grandparents.

How the hell did I get to this place?

*looks around, totally baffled*

I am better than a squirrel.

I just sat outside, under a tree, for about 3 hours, maybe a little more, while I worked on outlines for an exam Tuesday. It was really nice.

It took awhile for me to find this perfect tree. As anyone who watches Gilmore Girls will know, a good study tree has many requirements: it must be away from people and foot traffic, but accessible; it must give the illusion of seclusion, but allow me to watch other people; it must have a solid, comfortable trunk with not-scratchy bark; it must have a firm, flat area for laying out books, no ants or large creepy animals; has to be out of the sun, but have plenty of light.

This tree met all of those requirements (so I'll not be revealing the location, so I can go back) but it did have one unexpected problem: I had to fight a squirrel for it. Not even kidding. This squirrel apparently had a problem with me leaning against the tree, so came up above my head and chirped at me really loudly and flicked its tail. It was on. I had to assert my dominance as a superior species. I stood up, stared him down, sternly told him to go find his own tree. He left, and when he tried to return to my tree, I had to throw a stick at him to show him I meant business.

But he totally could have jumped on my head.

And with that, I'll transistion to the rest of my life as it is now:
I got to interview with the DMN, and it went fantastically better than last year. I'm sure the interviewer liked me personally, but I'm less confident about how he felt about me as a reporter. But I can't find out about that until mid-December; until then, I'm supposed to apply for many other internships to increase my odds of getting one somewhere. Because, no pressure, but I MUST have an internship this summer or ELSE. I have no idea what I'll end up doing if I don't get one. It won't be good. The problem is competition...there is so much, and I need a Paid internship; I can't afford to work for free. But most newspapers don't have much money for interns right now, so where does that leave me?

Adam and I are still doing well. He makes me so happy. I haven't gotten to see him as much lately as I would have liked; he's been really busy with his classes. But when we do get time together, I come out feeling more satisfied than I do most other times. I just wish we had better 'date' ideas -- it's tricky to do something different when neither of us drive.

Classes are going fine; I'm dealing with a general apathy in that regard right now, but I've got a grip on it. I have a test Tuesday, essay; that's what I spent most of the afternoon working on under the tree. My Online-J class is interesting, intellectually, but I'm struggling with getting stories. I have to get other people to write for me...and that's a weird place for me.

I'm anxious about next year. I have no idea where I'll be living. My parents (mom) want me to live on campus, back in the dorms, preferably as a RA thing. And I don't think I'll be an RA...I don't think I want to have that level of responsibility, be always working, never have a personal life, for very little. And I'm not sure I want to live in the dorms if I'm not; then I would be the only upperclassman in a predominantly freshman dorm, all without a car to visit my friends. How delightful. And I'm not sure I can live in an apartment; first, my parents wouldn't want me to, right now; I have no one to live with (well, sort of); I still have no car, that's a problem. I just feel like the sand is collapsing under my feet, and I need solid rock at some point.

I guess that's it, for now. Here's hopin', anyway.