Just another wave in the pond

Well, since Adam let his cat out of the proverbial bag, I guess now I have more of a reason to respond to it publicly. (If you have no idea what I'm talking about, read his blog post)
I have no answer to the question of what I'll be doing in 10 years. I have no idea what I'll be doing or where I'll be living in 5 or even 2 years. Everything is uncertainty for me now, which, although it makes me incredibly nervous, is just part of the journalism biz. I know that I hope to be living comfortably in an apartment in a reasonably-sized city, working on a features/news page for a moderately sized newspaper; I hope to feel part of the community and be happy and have friends.
But nothing is certain for me now. I don't have a clue what I would do if I couldn't be a reporter for whatever reason, especially what I would do if, as some pessimists say, the news industry hits the tank (which I don't believe for an instant, but I'll play along).
But one thing I was really fine with having an open-door policy on was my relationship with Adam. I don't know if I want to get married in the next 10 years, but I know I can see it as a possibility with him (I absolutely know it isn't an option now...not by a long shot). But I do feel it is a distinct possibility.
Or did. Until he told me he was seriously considering joining the military. When he said that, it was like the door on my open-ended, we'll-just-see-where-this-goes relationship slammed shut. If he leaves, I have to make a definite, important choice. I will have to choose if I want to be a military wife or girlfriend, waiting anxiously alone day in and out for months at a time, worrying about his safety, living largely as if I were single, and writing him frequent letters, my heart tied up in the words. And if I decided I couldn't handle that kind of life, I'd have to cut him loose; I'd still wonder how he was doing, and be concerned for his welfare, but I wouldn't tie him down to me, and I wouldn't be overcome with paranoia that he didn't love me anymore or was seeing some other woman, or that I'll end up on the wall of shame...or that he was hurt. Or...that I would wait for him for up to 6 years while he served, and he would come back a man I didn't know... But that would also make me feel guilty, horribly guilty, and selfish, for letting him go off into a terribly lonesome situation where he'll want someone to come home to, and I'll be letting him down.
I realize a lot can happen between now and then; heck, this lets-just-see-how-it-goes relationship might end before that time comes for some other, unrelated reason, or he might start writing a revolutionary book and decide against the military, or... or maybe something else. And I know it isn't fair, but his serious consideration of the military feels like one more forced, hard decision I'll have to make. And, while I deeply love him and support him and even understand his motivations, the fact that he might make that kind of choice (forcing me to chose as well) makes me awfully nervous and sad.